Rin A Past Unspoken
by Charming Demon
Summary: I played on the idea of when Rin first joined them, not talking etc, it just came to me as I am a freewriter type... I do not own any of the characters, so please excuse my for putting them through this ;p I hope my years on rpgs has helped, if not sorry!


As I follow, I know stories told, demons are bad, demons will eat you, demons this, demons that, but this demon saved me, I was in such a dark place and when I awoken, that beautiful demon held me there as I awoken. I owe him my life, so I follow until I am of some use. If a meal, so be it. If I am just ignored from here on out until something gets me, so be it… As the days go on and weeks it seems he's slowly trying to get me to speak, if it wasn't for the loud one, perhaps I would. Than one day soon after this thought I feel as though my mind was read, he sends the loud imp off with the two headed dragon, he takes me a little farther, about 2 miles in silence. We stop and there are many flowers that brighten my face and so I begin to pick the different ones. Then he speaks, I stop everything to listen to him, he's important to everyone. "Rin." I finally say.

Sesshoumaru hoped his next question would be as successful. "Rin, where are your family?"

Rin's brightened look changed to dread, "I watched my parents and brother murdered by bandits…" she says softly. He knew there was something more, but would she say it? Suddenly, she did and it was the only time she ever had to voice it. The bandits didn't kill her, but it wasn't as if she was left unscathed. "They took turns with me, t-they let me go two days later when t-they grew tired of me." she said darkly.

"The villagers thought they just killed my family in front of me, because I didn't talk to them, but a lot happens in 5 days." Then she put her hands on her knees, "I-I didn't want them to t-touch me…" she began to cry, but stopped herself, "W-When t-that is done to someone, they are ruined, and there is no reason for them to live anymore…" she hesitated, staring at her palms the whole time. "That's what I heard people say anyway. Nobody wants a used girl for their bride." she said meekly.

He said nothing, but sensed a need in her to belong somewhere. He picked her up with his moko-moko, and then held her to him. "You are only ruined if you want to be… Do you think you could point these bandits out to me in the future?" Rin's little heart pounded in fear and admiration as he set her down.

"Yes." she squeaked. When Jaken came back a little while later, he not only had fish, but he also had a kimono for Rin… Sesshoumaru had sensed a need to have a change in her little life, so he went all out as much as he could for her. He'd never had a child before, not even a pet unless you counted Aun…

As time went on, she thought he'd forgotten all about it, but one day, she stopped moving, Jaken was chattering away about how smug some humans can be… Sesshoumaru sensed her tension, "Is that them?" he asked her softly. "Them who?" Jaken squawked. Sesshoumaru knocked Jaken over then stepped on his face as he went to one of the men. "You do not deserve to call yourselves men." he growled. "Wha?" the man started. "Preying on little children, killing their families in front of them? How dare you live?" hatred seethed in every word spoken. One of the men spotted Rin and grinned, making Rin shake. "Oh so the little brat told you about that huh, she liked it." The ugliest of them said, the nicest looking one agreed as he laughed. It was easy for the demon to know how much they tormented her.

"Do you enjoy your food before you eat it demon? I could tell you what she likes best." His words caused Rin to faint, Jaken tried his best to catch her, even he realized what the little girl had endured before they took her in… "Perhaps I will see you all in hell." Sesshoumaru didn't waste any time, knowing he wouldn't add anything to her nightmares since she passed out and wouldn't see what he was to do to them all. He didn't even waste his blade on them, using his whip, he cut them into so many pieces they didn't need a burial. He picked Rin up and Jaken hung on his moko-moko and off they went, deep in the woods.

When Rin awoken, Jaken had been sent off, Sesshoumaru had her cradled in his moko-moko. "If you are hungry, Jaken went fishing…" she forced a smile. "Those bandits that hurt you are no more… They are dead." he said finally. She began to cry, hard. He didn't understand it, but pulled her close to him, putting his hand on her back. "Why are you sad Rin?" he asked softly. Rin fought the tears, "Because they're always in my nightmares. Nobody will ever want me around, I-I'm ruined." her vocabulary was indeed different then most her age just by being with them. "That is not something a child worries about." Sesshoumaru was surprised and confused. "Rin is pretty." Sesshoumaru tried to soothe her. His words did more than soothe her, maybe he was right she thought, from then on, she tried not to worry. Although, she'd still have those nightmares and ran to Sesshoumaru for comfort, which he tried even though he had no real idea how to comfort her.

As the years passed and she spent time with Kaede…

Rin learned a lot while being there, there were many things she didn't know of, she couldn't help but be grateful that the demons knew well enough to have her spend time with Kaede before her period began. It would have been embarrassing for all of them…

When he finally came to ask her what he'd always intended to ask her, he came prepared either way…

Rin came out of Kaede's home wearing the newest Kimono Sesshoumaru had gotten her.

Sesshoumaru felt strange, but as always kept it to himself, "Have you decided?" Rin suddenly looked clueless. "Decided?"

Sesshoumaru gave Jaken an angry glare, Jaken quickly went to Rin and whispered to her what he clearly forgot to tell her…

"Yes!" she beamed, "I miss going with you guys! Sticking to one place is rather dull and besides I learned a lot because of you guys." Rin looked so excited.

Sesshoumaru smirked, "Be ready to go soon then." She'd become quite a shapely young woman, as pretty as ever, no not pretty… beautiful.

Rin ran back inside and gathered her things while Kaede spoke with Sesshoumaru, although the imp replied more to her than Sesshoumaru did. Rin hadn't realized how many gifts she'd gotten just from Sesshoumaru alone until now. Eventually she came out, with some difficulty, Sesshoumaru kicked Jaken to her side, "Help her with her things…" he ordered.

Once they left and found a place to rest, mostly due to how tired Rin looked on Aun, it was late and they were in no real rush. He watched her sleep, wondering if she believed the words others had said. Ever since that day he'd hated the word 'ruined'. It was now too late to close his eyes or turn away, as her brown eyes had found his golden eyes lost in thought. "Lord Sesshoumaru? What's wrong?" she asked innocently as she sat up, yawned and stretched, she blinked. He didn't really want to answer her, "Are you happy?" he decided on asking.

She forced a smile and he knew the real answer as she said the opposite, "Yes of course I am." He frowned, "You can tell me the truth." he urged. Her smile vanished for a moment, but came back. "But I am happy to be back with you guys." she said softly. Then she sighed, "I just still have those nightmares sometimes." she sounded lost. "But now that you're with me, maybe they'll be gone." she hoped. "If they come back, I will wake you." he promised.

As the days flew by and they got reacquainted, they got along just as well as they had before. Only Rin respected Jaken a little more and Jaken didn't blame her as often…

One night, she had the nightmare again, she cried softly in her sleep and as promised, Sesshoumaru woke her, holding her in his arms, he tried to soothe her as best he could. Rin looked into his caring eyes, "Why do you care about me?" she asked, his reaction was of shock, he hadn't expected this. "That's a foolish question." but then she began to cry harder. "I-I care about you, I know not why." her crying calmed. "Am I ruined?" she asked suddenly. He looked angry, "Of course not."

"Why?" she coaxed. He hadn't expected this either, "Why do you think I know everything?" he said, then added, "I just know what happened wasn't your fault, so how can that make you no good, or ruined as you say?"

Rin wiped her eyes, then hugged him, "You do know everything." she teased. But he wondered if she was just pushing it aside to deal with at some other time, or if she truly believed his words. It seemed like forever while he held her, but he didn't feel like he wasted any time. He was rather glad. It was the last time he held her so close as the years rolled by. As she turned 20, she began to lose her smile, she seemed quite miserable.

When she walked, she got Jaken angry for walking too slowly, after this carried on for a few more days. Jaken was finally sent off on an errand with Aun. Sesshoumaru waited with her in silence, finally he sighed, "Why are you so sad these days Rin?" she couldn't look at him when she replied. "I'm 20 now, I was right, I'm not worth anyone's time, …I'm ruined." She finally choked back her tears to add those last two words.

Sesshoumaru once again came to her and held her in his arms as he did when she was a child, "What do you mean by that Rin?" he looked confused and pained; her words had concerned him greatly. "Women my age have a husband and at least 2 children by now." she sighed heavily as her eyes finally looked up into his. Now he understood. "Rin, you could, at any time, spend time in one of the villages…" he didn't know what she'd prefer, so he added. "Or you could spend some time with some suitable male demons that do not eat humans…" Rin sighs, "I'd much rather be with you, forever." she blushes.

He looks confused for a moment; this wasn't at all what he expected from her. "Well, if you like… I won't keep you from staying with us." he says, obliviously. "That still doesn't make sense, why were you sad? Did you think I was going to just get rid of you when you got to a certain age?" he says, still not understanding her. Rin smiles, "I knew I would never be good enough for you." the tears that welled up in her eyes begin to stain her cheeks. Sesshoumaru blinks, he never really saw her as a woman, not really.

He'd always seen her as his little girl, his. He found himself lost for words, but held her as he always had. He wondered when she began to think like this. As he pondered this, she continued to cry, it was unrequited love, her mind says repeatedly. Sesshoumaru finally pulls away from her slightly, "Rin, I have never considered this relationship with you." he hesitated, "I will think this through… A human was my father's downfall as you know my father died for a human and her son." he wondered for a moment more.

"I would gladly follow my father's footsteps for a human such as you as a mate or not. I have somewhat considered you as somewhere between my daughter and my pet, so… this may take some time, as I am sure my words may hurt you." He was right, him calling her daughter… pet… somewhere in between? It hurt her plenty. And he knew it from her change of heartbeat. He hated the pain he gave her with his words, it hurt him to see her like this, it was not normal feelings for a demon, he blamed his father as he held her again. "I never meant to hurt you." he spoke softly. "You became important to me rather quickly. I have never been much of a mate." he added, admitting far more then she knew.

Rin pulled away slightly, "I don't care, I love you for who you are, I'll be your pet, I don't care, I would be your slave if it would suite your interests." At this, Sesshoumaru's eyes grew large, then he growled. "Do not mistake the meaning of my words, what I meant was when you were a child. And I would never own a slave."

His words made her smile, she wiped away her tears, then sighed, "I guess I have to wait for you to grow up then?" she asks. He smirks, "You really have matured more than I ever let myself notice before." Rin looks up into his eyes, "Does that mean I stand a chance?" Sesshoumaru tilts his head, "Oh, I see, so you think I have some kind of trail of females hiding around somewhere? You are the only one Rin, who has told me her feelings without fear, without arrogance, but with the most important thing, love." he felt foolish for saying that word, but it was true. "We'll see how things turn out." he admits further.

"Alright." Rin replies happily. Jaken came back with Aun, clueless, but shocked at their embrace. "Jaken, go to bed." Sesshoumaru said teasingly, Jaken obeyed. Rin was tempted to further tease Jaken, but was too shy to do so much with Sesshoumaru. As she slept, her head on Aun's paw, Sesshoumaru watched her sleep, thinking it over…


End file.
